Newsletter, November 11, 2008
"Play is the highest form of consciousness. It is synonymous with the the state of "presence", the most evolved state that humans access." from Heal the Child Program by Jon Bredal, MA
Is play part of your life? Are you holding out-dated beliefs around play such as:
"I
am only allowed to play when my work is done."
"When I play, I am wasting my time."
"Play is a luxury I squeeze into the end of my week."
If you are, consider this: play allows us to connect with others, build trust, take risks. Playing from the heart increases our energy level, shifting us out of negativity. It can lead us to the source of our own creativity and new ways of thinking and behaving. Play allows us to practice "being in the moment", the place of unlimited potential.
This past weekend I had the privilege of attending a workshop, "Healing the Child" conducted by Jon Bredal. It was a heart-centered, joyful two days with plenty of time to play and connect with our inner child. Jon taught me some important lessons about working with children. I would like to share some of them with you.
Rapport is the first step in building positive relationships. One of the first rules regarding influencing others is to establish rapport. If you don't have rapport, don't proceed. Rapport sends a powerful message to the child that they have the right to exist. It establishes an emotional and energy bond with the child that allows you to influence the child in a positive way.
Clearing our own negative beliefs and limiting thought patterns will go a long way toward helping our child to heal. Most of our beliefs are hidden in our subconscious, outside of our awareness. However, our children help to point the way. Whenever you find yourself getting angry or on the defensive with your child, you know that you are holding a pattern that needs to be released. This is not about the child but about you. Is s/he triggering some aspect of yourself that you have not accepted? Is your anger hiding guilt and shame? Realizing this will allow you to see your child's behaviour in a new perspective.
Accept what is. Nobody needs to be "fixed". When we start from a place of acceptance, we create the space for change to happen. The more we push for change, the more we bring out the opposite. A good example in the international sphere is the United States' reaction to 9/11. What the American leaders wanted to obtain was safety and respect. Going in with the "big guns" resulted in the opposite. Keep this in mind when you are trying to influence your child. Your pushing for change will build resistance to the very change you are seeking.
The child heals herself/himself. This is true for all of us. If you go to a practitioner and you get good results, it is because you where ready to make that change. An effective practitioner creates a safe space and helps you release the blocks preventing you from going the next step. We are not responsible for our child's healing, or not: s/he is.
Let go of the outcome. Whenever working with your child for positive change, set your intention and then let it go. Focusing too much on the outcome sets both of you up for failure.
How does play fit into the picture? Children explore the world through play: movement, fantasy and imagination. They try on roles, explore their feelings, and come to know themselves better. Here are a few ideas to get you started.
Balloons
The whole family can join in this one.
Materials- round balloons, of various colours.
Number of players: minimum 2.
Have fun blowing up the balloons together. Each player uses one balloon hitting
it in the air. Then make up your own rules. For example, hit the balloon with
only one part of the body. Hit the balloon to a partner. Skip and hit. Spin and
hit. Hit over your head. Hit while walking on all fours. Children and adults
take turns making up rules.
Balls
Players- minimum 2
Materials- use soft. bouncing balls. Bean bags can replace balls for
children who have difficulty grasping a ball. Bounce ball to a partner, close
distance. Then increase the distance. Add movements as you make up your own
rules. Example- throw with one hand, catch with the other.
Jon Bredal can be contacted at jonbredal@earthlink.net
Workshops
If you would like to find ways to improve
learning for yourself or others, don't miss these upcoming workshops:
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